caffeinepig

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The break is going to the end. The coming semester is gonna begin next Monday. It seems to me like another adventure waiting ahead for me to write the whole story. I’ve been prepared for this moment. Things come and go. Just do your best and let it be. Conquer the fear and trust your inner instinct..I bet, You can make it!! 

Today, after the committee meeting, I finally "officially" become a doctoral candidate. I finally achieve the stage of ABD, All-about-dissertation….It's weird, thought. Where is my feeling of happiness??Am I waiting for this moment for a long time???I do not feel excited; even not feel happy at all, just a bit of relief…Man….~I shall enjoy this happy moment. After all, I have done a lot to reach this far, right?Maybe I worry too much?Maybe I'm overwhelmed?Maybe this feeling is just more than happy? So, I am not as happy as I expected?? It should be something else that I should feel it, but I am not…?

The following ten days, I'm gonna to have a solitary retreat for my qualifying exam. 
After almost 7 month studying, those piles of articles have made me feel like vomiting, especially every time when I have to dig out articles for an answer or references ...
Gee...., can you imagine if someone feeds you the same kind of stuff every day  24 hours a day  for 7 months, even if you really feel sick of it? 
At this very moment, I feel just the same way!!
This day finally comes...

I did this quiz several days ago, and the result came out to be very interesting to me.
To me, a word just popped up right after I read this result, "PICKY" !!
I wouldn't argue this when people say to me that I'm kinda picky in some ways. I don’t doubt it; I admit it instead.
Somehow I feel good to be crowned as a picky person. As I often tell my friends that I'm more like a Virgo, though I do possess some ways to look like a Leo, of course, in good ways..  :)

 Okay, I'm a Virgo-ized Leo. (it’s good that this contradictory personality has been solved smartly by this invented term. …:)    )

 “Sun still goes up and down, this small earth still rotates itself everyday, and life still moves on no matter how good or bad of what you have done. So, stopping abusing yourself cuz life is meant to be enjoyed…..Relaxed…..!” 
I’m now in a hypnotic state….

 Don’t wake me up!!

 

 

I feel restless recently. I can feel that my mind is agitated and getting impulsive. I can feel myself impatient and rush for everything. I even can feel it from my pace of walking. I cannot stop being anxious. My heart is beating so fast and heavily. All of the sudden, I seem to look everything and every people around me with hatred…
Gee… I need to stop myself doing this, hurting my mind and my soul… 
" Don’t let your feeling lead your mind !!! "This line came across to my mind while I was try to mediate on the way backing home.
Yes, I need to stop letting my feeling control my mind. I need to segregate my mind from this restless feeling…
Medating, Medating, Medating....

The weather report on TV has been predicting that today is going to have the first snow. I was thinking, “what nonsense is this? No way! It’s still too early to snow…” Last night, I intendedly opened the window to check out the weather outside in a way of measuring the moisture by a 15-story height from the ground. Yeah, No doubt! I live in a penthouse on campus. I always joke this to myself as a little compensation for this boring life here. This morning, the weather from my widow looks….well, fine. Although sun doesn’t show up, the sky is bright enough to be claimed it as a fair day. Before I was about to dress up for school, I suspiciously got online to check the weather again. Still, it says “85% snow shower in the afternoon….” All right, I don’t want to get sick just because I don’t buy the modern technology of weather prediction. I decided to have a coat with me, just………in case. Gee, I can’t believe of what I see. It is really snowing, though it is not snow flake but only snow ice, still, it’s snowing!! As I can see the white spot is getting larger and almost turning to be flake-like.  I can’t help but showing a bit of grinning on my face.  Am I expecting the coming of snow? I don’t know exactly. It is a kinda complicate question. I like snow, though. It makes the environment look romantic, especially during the holiday season. All streets and trees were decorated by sparking-twinkling lights against the background of white snow. I can wear several layers of clothes under my favorite heavy coat, no matter it is wool long coat or down-goose jacket.  With scarf and wool hot, I can wrap myself like a bear, joltily walking on the snow. I can also leave my trace of footprint, like Big Foot Harly. On the other hand, however, snowing day increases the difficulty and hazardousness of driving. And it makes me feel freezing and do not want to go outdoor. Then, like a vicious circle, as time goes by, I would become a couch potato, a big lazy bug keeping staying at home. So, it's not easy to assertively answer if I like snow.Well, thinking back to those disliking points, it seems not too bad about being a lazy bug, doesn't it?
 I still like snow!!

在台灣的教師節，我在Yahoo E-Card 裡挑了一張教師卡給我碩士論文的指導教授─洪老師。
也不知道為什麼，其實有好多話想說。但在卡片裡到最後我只寫下了兩句話....
出國唸書到現在，唯一常常讓我想念的老師，就是洪老師。
常常想起在寫論文的那段期間，跟老師在電腦前面一同研究數據，一同problem solving...在車上跟老師討論論文進度，學術專業。
老師的外表看起來很嚴肅，但是其實洪老師是個心思細膩又浪漫的學者。對我來說，甚至是其他同學，大家都知道洪老師精通天文地理、中醫藥學、中英古詩、16種語言、還有聲樂。洪老師是個天才！
很懷念以前的那一段時光....

看到朋友的這篇網誌，覺的心有同感......
最近又接觸到真多有關於崇洋媚外的議題..
在美國呆了超過5年..
的確早就見到很多台灣女生媚外的情形..也見怪不怪了..
大部分的男人在背後說這現象的時候..自然不會說的太好聽(其實是很難聽)

這篇是補寫9月7號那天，哥哥的寶寶來到了這個世界
當天好巧，我恰巧打電話回家，難得是爸爸接電話。 平常都是老媽大人接，等到她說的差不多時，時間已經過了一大半。老爸根本沒有機會說半句話。所以那天就跟他小聊了一下...
剛好，老媽大人打手機給老爸。我要老爸別掛電話，我可以等一下
後來，聽到電話那一頭，老爸說「生了喔？母子都平安。寶寶很健康，快3000克重...」
我在電話這一頭， 聽到了也不知道在跟著興奮什麼